"The Corporate Weenie Almanac"
Biblio File column
Humor writer C.L. Smith's father died on Memorial Day in 2021 at the age of 99. In Smith's new book, a sequel of sorts to "Tongue In Chico," the Chico State grad pictures his dad, proud in his military uniform, and acknowledges that he didn't like the first book and wouldn't have liked the second. "But," he writes, "I will still always love and miss him anyway. Semper fi."
As for the new book, it's "a satirical look at current pop culture and the modern workplace, gleaned from my 30 years as a marketing executive in the fast-food and telecommunications industries." Think lousy puns (but I repeat myself), politically incorrect observations, naughty innuendo. And that's just page 1.
"The Corporate Weenie Almanac" ($7.45 in paperback from Tenderfoot Books; also for Amazon Kindle), designed and illustrated by Randy Nowell, is like Mad Magazine with a bit more leering.
A corporate weenie is "a humanoid denizen of the managerial class, known primarily for kissing up to superiors while lording their presumed authority over resentful subordinates in the modern workplace." If you've ever had an office job, you know one, but, of course, you've never been one. So take heart: this book isn't written for you.
The food section features "recipes for disaster," including "The Bad Hire." "Ingredients: (1) urgent need to fill a key position, (1) imminent hiring freeze, (1) Yay! The perfect candidate. Instructions: Skip background check. Ignore 1-3 sketchy references. Why? The freeze is coming! Marinate and simmer. Newbie skips new-hire orientation. Calls in sick the next day. Files long-term disability claim. Bring to boil. Sues company for emotional distress. The resumé was fake. It's HR's fault! Update your own fake resumé ASAP."
Mix in corporate cliches, like "Let's Circle Back on That" (a way to forget something); pandemic mask-wearing as pop art; politically correct classic rock ("I Saw Her Standing There by The Beatles. Pronoun problem. Change the title and lyrics to 'I Saw Her/Him/Them Standing/Sitting/Lying/Chilling/Twerking There'"); Tongue in Chico advice; and cosmic weenie astrology—and you have a recipe for a wonderful backyard BBQ.
To get the conversation going, the pages make great starter material, if you know what I mean.
Copyright Chico Enterprise-Record; used by permission